janderson.net/blog » Grandma

I still miss you Grandma.

jim — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 07:00:00 +0000

Martha E. Anderson

Dec. 7th 1923 – Jan. 21st 2005

PostSecret

jim — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 17:48:00 +0000

This is the best PostSecret I’ve ever read. I wish I had a voice mail from my grandmother.

If you can’t read it it says:

“I continue to save a voicemail from my grandmother. i listen every day. hearing her voice reminds me that I’m not alone. she dies 2 and a half years ago.”

—–Email Message—–
Sent: Sunday, October 26, 2008 5:46 PM
Subject: grandma’s voicemail

I have three voicemails my 34 year old cousin left me on my cell phone before she died of ovarian cancer over three years ago. In 3 years I will be older than she was when she died and my goal is to keep those voicemails until then. Maybe I’ll keep them forever.

—–Email Message—–
Sent: Sunday, October 26, 2008 10:16 PM
Subject: grandma’s voicemail

I work for a major cell phone carrier. About once a year we hear of a story where someone is desperately hanging on to a voicemail from a lost loved one. We will put a hard copy of a voicemail from a lost loved one in your hands if you ask. It could be the greeting on their phone or a message they left on yours. We want you to have those memories. Please ask.

Cold December

jim — Fri, 07 Dec 2007 15:36:00 +0000

Martha E. Anderson
Dec. 7th, 1923 – Feb 21st, 2005

I wrote and record Cold December in memory of my Grandmother December 2006. This is when I first start recording, and before I took vocal lessons. I plan on rerecording it in a better quality. She deserves it.

Click here to hear Cold December.

Cold December
Sitting under this tree I say a prayer
Wishing you here, here for me.
Leaving flowers show how much I care
Holding up a promise “Always take care.”

It’s a cold December
Dark and lonely
I wish I could remember
Every word you said to me
I know I haven’t been the
Picture prefect one
I stand up strong
For everything I’ve done wrong

A couple of years have gone by still I cry
It’s been a while since I’ve came by
It seams so hard no matter how I try
When will the empty fill back in?

It’s a cold December
Dark and lonely
I wish I could remember
Every word you said to me
I know I haven’t been the
Picture prefect one
I stand up strong
For everything I’ve done wrong

Dec. 7th

jim — Thu, 07 Dec 2006 20:31:00 +0000

Most people remember Dec. 7th as the day Pearl Harbor was bombed. I remember that too, but mostly I remember my grandmother. She would have been 83 today. I still really miss her. Of all of my family members that have past on she is the only one I still get chocked up over. She past away almost 2 years a go. Today I try and remember the good times. Her picking me up from day care and singing songs with me all the way home in her old baby blue Chevy Luv truck, her listening to all of my fictitious stories, and never questioning if I was lying (We both knew I was), and probably the best thing ANY Grandmother could do… Tell me I was destined for greatness, and all I had to do was put my mind to it.

I miss you Grandma.

Martha E. Anderson
Dec. 7th 1923 – Jan. 21st 2005

Visiting Grandma

jim — Mon, 23 Jan 2006 19:12:00 +0000

Saturday the 21th of Jan. marked the one year anniversary of my grandmother’s death. My Dad, Anja, and I went to visit my Grandmother’s grave on Saturday. It was the first time I’ve seen the grave with her there. My Grandfather shares the same plot with my Grandmother, and I’ve visited his grave several times before.

It was rather sad. My Dad really took her death very hard. Visiting her grave was extremely difficult for him, but I feel it was a good step in his extended grievance process. He left a wooden name plate that said “Mama” on her headstone. Seeing my Dad cry is one of the hardest things for me to see.

While we were their we visited my Sister’s grave as well. She doesn’t have a headstone. My parents could afford to buy her one at the time. I’ve always wanted to buy her one. I should do that in the near future. I found out her birth/death date. Dec. 10th 1979. That would make her 26 years old today if she was still alive. She swallowed her one stool forcing them to have a emergency cesarean. She only lived for a few hours.

All in all I’m glad we went even though it weighed heavily on the heart.